measi's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Personality tests... Me? Jump on a bandwagon? NEVER! *snort* I had conflicting results on the newest test that everyone is taking. I scored a six on both type 2 and type 6. I agree completely with both of them. I scored a 5 for Type 9: The Peacemaker, which also fits to an extent. Perhaps I'll have to take the full test to find out exactly which one is "me" Type 2: The Helper World View: People depend on my help. I am needed. Basic Desire: to be loved Basic Fear: of being unloved Healthy loop controlled by Basic Desire: Need to be loved -> help others -> loved -> Need to be loved In the healthy state, the need to be loved induces Type Twos to help others which causes them to be loved. When Twos feel loved, the need is satisfied and a balance is reached. In the average state, when Twos' are not helping others and are not loved, the need to be loved increases, which helps Twos to again reach out and help others. Thus the balancing loop can help Twos to recover. Unhealthy loop controlled by Basic Fear: Fear of being unloved -> resent and manipulate others -> loved -> Fear of being unloved In the unhealthy state, the basic fear of being unloved can cause Type Twos to feel resentful and try to manipulate others into loving them. This can cause people to love them even less, which further increases Twos' basic fear. The cycle continues to build up. Insight: We can see from the diagram that a way to help break the control of the basic fear is to weaken the unhealthy loop. Twos can refrain from manipulating others but start to genuinely help others. This will cause Twos to be loved, and thus reduce the fear of being unloved. How to Get Along with Me * Tell me that you appreciate me. Be specific. * Share fun times with me. * Take an interest in my problems, though I will probably try to focus on yours. * Let me know that I am important and special to you. * Be gentle if you decide to criticize me. In Intimate Relationships * Reassure me that I am intersting to you. * Reassure me often that you love me. * Tell me I'm attractive and that you're glad to be seen with me. What I Like About Being a Two * being able to relate easily to people and to make friends * knowing what people need and being able to make their lives better * being generous, caring, and warm * being sensitive to and perceptive about others' feelings * being enthusiastic and fun-loving, and having a good sense of humor What's Hard About Being a Two * not being able to say no * having low self-esteem * feeling drained from overdoing for others * not doing things I really like to do for myself for fear of being selfish * criticizing myself for not feeling as loving as I think I should * being upset that others don't tune in to me as much as I tume in to them * working so hard to be tactful and considerate that I suppress my real feelings Twos as Children Often * are very sensitive to disapproval and criticism * try hard to please their parents by being helpful and understanding * are outwardly compliant * are popular or try to be popular with other children * act coy, precocious, or dramatic in order to get attention * are clowns and jokers (the more extroverted Twos), or quiet and shy (the more introverted Twos) Twos as Parents * are good listeners, love their children unconditionally, and are warm and encouraging (or suffer guilt if they aren't) * are often playful with their children * wonder: "Am I doing it right?" "Am I giving enough?" "Have I caused irreparable damage?" * can become fiercely protective Type 6: The Skeptic World View: The world is a threatening place. I need to look to authority, but I question it. Basic Desire: to be secure Basic Fear: of being abandoned Healthy loop controlled by Basic Desire: Need to be secure -> loyal -> security -> Need to be secure In the healthy state, the need to be secure induces Type Sixes to be loyal to others, especially the authority. This increases their security among others, which satisfies their need and a balance is reached. In the average state, when Sixes' are not not being so loyal to others, they start to feel insecure among others. This increases the need to be secure, which helps Sixes to again seek out authority and become loyal to it, or become more loyal to others around them. Thus the balancing loop can help Sixes to recover. Unhealthy loop controlled by Basic Fear: Fear of being abandoned -> distrust others -> security -> Fear of being abandoned In the unhealthy state, the basic fear of being abandoned can cause Type Sixes to become suspicious of others and start to distrust others. This reduces their sense of security, which further increases Sixes' basic fear. The cycle continues to build up. Insight: We can see from the diagram that a way to help break the control of the basic fear is to weaken the unhealthy loop. Sixes can refrain from distrusting others, and begin to be more loyal to others. This will make them feel more secure, thus reduce their fear of being abandoned. The Questioner (the Six) Questioners are responsible, trustworthy, and value loyalty to family, friends, groups, and causes. Their personalities range broadly from reserved and timid to outspoken and confrontative. How to Get Along with Me * Be direct and clear. * Listen to me carefully. * Don't judge me for my anxiety. * Work things through with me. * Reassure me that everything is OK between us. * Laugh and make jokes with me. * Gently push me toward new experiences. * Try not to overreact to my overreacting. What I Like About Being a Six * being committed and faithful to family and friends * being responsible and hardworking * being compassionate toward others * having intellect and wit * being a nonconformist * confronting danger bravely * being direct and assertive What's Hard About Being a Six * the constant push and pull involved in trying to make up my mind * procrastinating because of fear of failure; having little confidence in myself * fearing being abandoned or taken advantage of * exhausting myself by worrying and scanning for danger * wishing I had a rule book at work so I could do everything right * being too critical of myself when I haven't lived up to my expectations Sixes as Children Often * are friendly, likable, and dependable, and/or sarcastic, bossy, and stubborn * are anxious and hypervigilant; anticipate danger * form a team of "us against them" with a best friend or parent * look to groups or authorities to protect them and/or question authority and rebel * are neglected or abused, come from unpredictable or alcoholic families, and/or take on the fearfulness of an overly anxious parent Sixes as Parents * are often loving, nurturing, and have a strong sense of duty * are sometimes reluctant to give their children independence * worry more than most that their children will get hurt * sometimes have trouble saying no and setting boundaries [bar] And just for shits 'n giggles, I sit right on the border of both the INFP and INFJ. I've never taken the full test, but I sit firmly between the two, depending on my mood. Portrait of the Healer (iNFp) Copyrighted � 1996 Prometheus Nemesis Book Company. Healer Idealists are abstract in thought and speech, cooperative in striving for their ends, and informative and introverted in their interpersonal relations. Healer present a seemingly tranquil, and noticiably pleasant face to the world, and though to all appearances they might seem reserved, and even shy, on the inside they are anything but reserved, having a capacity for caring not always found in other types. They care deeply-indeed, passionately-about a few special persons or a favorite cause, and their fervent aim is to bring peace and integrity to their loved ones and the world. Healers have a profound sense of idealism derived from a strong personal morality, and they conceive of the world as an ethical, honorable place. Indeed, to understand iNFps, we must understand their idealism as almost boundless and selfless, inspiring them to make extraordinary sacrifices for someone or something they believe in. The iNFp is the Prince or Princess of fairytale, the King's Champion or Defender of the Faith, like Sir Galahad or Joan of Arc. Healers are found in only 1 percent of the general population, although, at times, their idealism leaves them feeling even more isolated from the rest of humanity. �Healers seek unity in their lives, unity of body and mind, emotions and intellect, perhaps because they are likely to have a sense of inner division threaded through their lives, which comes from their often unhappy childhood. Healers live a fantasy-filled childhood, which, unfortunately, is discouraged or even punished by many parents. In a practical-minded family, required by their parents to be sociable and industrious in concrete ways, and also given down-to-earth siblings who conform to these parental expectations, iNFps come to see themselves as ugly ducklings. Other types usually shrug off parental expectations that do not fit them, but not the iNFps. Wishing to please their parents and siblings, but not knowing quite how to do it, they try to hide their differences, believing they are bad to be so fanciful, so unlike their more solid brothers and sisters. They wonder, some of them for the rest of their lives, whether they are OK. They are quite OK, just different from the rest of their family-swans reared in a family of ducks. Even so, to realize and really believe this is not easy for them. Deeply committed to the positive and the good, yet taught to believe there is evil in them, iNFps can come to develop a certain fascination with the problem of good and evil, sacred and profane. Tutors are drawn toward purity, but can become engrossed with the profane, continuously on the lookout for the wickedness that lurks within them. Then, when iNFps believe thay have yielded to an impure temptation, they may be given to acts of self-sacrifice in atonement. Others seldom detect this inner turmoil, however, for the struggle between good and evil is within the iNFp, who does not feel compelled to make the issue public. Portrait of the Counselor (iNFj) Copyrighted � 1996-9 Prometheus Nemesis Book Company. The Counselor Idealists are abstract thought and speech, cooperative in reaching their goals, and directive and introverted in their interpersonal roles. Counselors focus on human potentials, think in terms of ethical values, and come easily to decisions. The small number of this type (little more than 2 percent) is regrettable, since Counselors have an unusually strong desire to contribute to the welfare of others and genuinely enjoy helping their companions. Although Counsleors tend to be private, sensitive people, and are not generally visible leaders, they nevertheless work quite intensely with those close to them, quietly exerting their influence behind the scenes with their families, friends, and colleagues. This type has great depth of personality; they are themselves complicated, and can understand and deal with complex issues and people. Counselors can be hard to get to know. They have an unusually rich inner life, but they are reserved and tend not to share their reactions except with those they trust. With their loved ones, certainly, Counselors are not reluctant to express their feelings, their face lighting up with the positive emotions, but darkening like a thunderhead with the negative. Indeed, because of their strong ability to take into themselves the feelings of others, Counselors can be hurt rather easily by those around them, which, perhaps, is one reason why they tend to be private people, mutely withdrawing from human contact. At the same time, friends who have known an Counselor for years may find sides emerging which come as a surprise. Not that they are inconsistent; Counselors value their integrity a great deal, but they have intricately woven, mysterious personalities which sometimes puzzle even them. Counselors have strong empathic abilities and can become aware of another's emotions or intentions -- good or evil -- even before that person is conscious of them. This "mind-reading" can take the form of feeling the hidden distress or illnesses of others to an extent which is difficult for other types to comprehend. Even Counselors can seldom tell how they came to penetrate others' feelings so keenly. Furthermore, the Counselor is most likely of all the types to demonstrate an ability to understand psychic phenomena and to have visions of human events, past, present, or future. What is known as ESP may well be exceptional intuitive ability-in both its forms, projection and introjection. Such supernormal intuition is found frequently in the Counselor, and can extend to people, things, and often events, taking the form of visions, episodes of foreknowledge, premonitions, auditory and visual images of things to come, as well as uncanny communications with certain individuals at a distance. Mohandas Gandhi� and Eleanor Roosevelt are examples of the Counselor Idealist (INFJ). 1:42 p.m. - 12 November 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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